| Isn't it amazing that we're surrounded by people, but | | | | quickly plummet down into depression. Instead of this, |
| infinitely lonely? A feeling of loneliness hits people from | | | | get busy. Switch to a pro-active, "what's next?" |
| all walks of life, singles as well as married people. | | | | mindset. Look for ways to meet new people. Find |
| Not too long ago, I received a call from a man who | | | | something useful or creative to do. You could even |
| lost his wife and was feeling extremely lonely. He | | | | volunteer your time for an organization. Margie told |
| reported that he sorely missed his wife and that doing | | | | me she would like to meet someone, but being alone |
| things alone had frequently left him depressed. | | | | had its advantages. When I asked what they were, |
| "I'm like a fish out of water," he exclaimed. | | | | she replied, "You can't get hurt staying by yourself!" |
| He never had many friends or joined clubs. He had no | | | | Margie felt like the possibility of rejection was greater |
| hobbies or special interests. "I feel like life is nothing | | | | than any pleasure she might experience in being |
| without her." He wanted to know if there is a cure for | | | | vulnerable and making new friends. |
| loneliness and if what he was experiencing was | | | | It doesn't have to be that way. Examine your state of |
| normal. | | | | loneliness. Think about what you can do differently. |
| Obviously, this man was most upset about losing his | | | | Where can you go to meet new people? How can |
| wife. He felt abandoned and alone, and wasn't sure | | | | you find "common ground" or something to talk about? |
| what he could do to feel happy again. | | | | Strike up a conversation with strangers. |
| Feeling lonely is a common phenomenon. It's not just | | | | Loneliness is usually a temporary condition. All it takes |
| widowed people who feel lonely. People who are | | | | is one another person, and you're no longer by |
| married or in a close relationship can also feel lonely. | | | | yourself. |
| Some people feel very restless and isolated when | | | | That's why I encourage you to step out of your |
| they are alone. However, being alone need not be a | | | | comfort zone, and talk to someone. To be a friend, |
| dark and dreary experience. We can enjoy spending | | | | you must first show yourself friendly. |
| time with ourselves. | | | | If you are struggling, take the time to work through any |
| Sometimes, thinking to ourselves is an opportunity to | | | | issues you might be facing. If necessary, seek |
| "go inside" and reflect, create meaning or a find a new | | | | professional help. There is no reason why we should |
| understanding. | | | | face life alone. And please, do not try to deal with |
| Sometimes, being alone gives us time that's needed to | | | | loneliness by using drinking, overeating, drugs, or |
| learn a new hobby, play an instrument, read a book (or | | | | withdrawing to bed. These methods are not healthy |
| write one), exercise, do something creative or artistic, | | | | and will make matters worse. |
| or learn a new language. | | | | Instead, make an effort to talk to people. If you are |
| Being alone can be a rewarding experience. Perhaps | | | | shy, join a club, special interest group, or take a course. |
| the key is not feeling sorry for yourself (or self-pity). | | | | The next time you feel alone, jump up and make |
| When we feel sorry for ourselves, your thoughts can | | | | something happen. You'll be glad that you did! |